The Monkey who Saved the World from Nuclear War

 Fiction

The Monkey who saved the World from Nuclear War

There once was a man who had a very bad mother.  His mother just had him around so she could get a welfare check.  She was supposed to get money to buy him food but gave him expired food that factories were giving away.and kept the money to spend on herself instead of buying him healthy food before the expiration date.

When he was old enough that the welfare check decreased but not yet an adult his mother sent him to his grandmother. because she could not get as much of a welfare check from him even though he dutifully obeyed her and babysat the other children she had with other fathers and provided valuable services to her before she kicked him out.

When he turned 18 he joined the navy to fight terrorists and protect American freedom.  He worked in military intelligence and was sent into the desert even though he was in the Navy which was supposed to do stuff on water.

Even though he saw people die in the Navy and nearly died himself it was less traumatic to him then how his mom abandoned him.  He got an economics degree and worked in a government office after completing his military service.

In order to prevent terrorist attacks on the building from a bomb inside a vehicle.  The parking lot was a very far distance from the building he worked in.  He would arrive early to the building in order to park as close as possible before the other parking spots fill, then get all his work done early before the supervisors arrive.

When the supervisors arrived it would look like he was doing nothing because he already got all the work done for the day and he nearly got fired.  But when they reviewed his work it was shown that he completed more work every single other employee individually did in his entire division.

He was not rewarded for this however and told that he needs to be working when the supervisors are watching.  He learned that other employees arrive early then go to sleep in the office until right before the supervisor's show up then start their work for the day so that they would do the work when the supervisor is watching.  He quit the work and started his own business doing financial planning assistance to clients on his own time.

During his life he dated many women.  Every single one was evil.  At first he thought it was his own fault and tried to fix himself.  But eventually he realized it was their fault.

He became so traumatized that he started to wear a monkey costume and play with dolls.  He started to do podcasts while wearing a monkey costume explaining how women manipulate men into manipulating other men to the harm of society.  Or how men betray other men to try to become popular with women resulting in women being able to control men through the violence of men who are willing to betray other men to try to be popular with women.

Although he was a total loser in the eyes of mainstream society and every one mocked him saying who hurt you, he saved the world.

What happened was Spiz Rail wanted to defeat his home country and start a Nuclear war.  Spiz Rail had convinced his home country to give weapons of mass destruction to a country on the border of Rue Rue.  They said technically this was not engaging in war against Rue Rue, but Rue Rue started attacking the country that borders it to defend itself and winning.  But the more Rue Rue won and the more his home country lost in the border wars the harder his home country pushed back and people in the President's Cabinet started suggesting nuclear war could be survivable.

Now the Monkey thought this made no sense, why would someone be so suicidal as to do this.  The Monkey then realised that more than one half of the president of his home country's entire cabinet all considered Spiz Rail to be their homeland first before the country they claimed to represent.  He realized Spiz Rail was trying to destroy his home country and actually wanted nuclear war with the plan of being the only country left in the world.  People from Spiz Rail have invaded all other countries in the world in government positions and always put Spiz Rail first before their own country's well being.

He realized they did not fear destroying their own country that they live in through mutually assured destruction in a nuclear war but actually intended to create such an event destroying all countries but Spiz Rail.  But he realised since they put the well being of Spiz Rail even before the country they live in, the only way to get them not to destroy the world with nukes was to get them to fear they might accidentally destroy their beloved Spiz Rail in their attempt to destroy all the other countries in the world.

He changed the focus of his podcasts and explained the only way to save the world from nuclear war.

Spitz Rail had lots and lots of weapons of mass destruction including nukes.  But was always trying to get people to destroy the little country of Rina claiming that they must be destroyed to prevent them from building weapons of mass destruction like nukes and must not be allowed to have nuclear power plants or nuclear medicine.  Spitz Rail claimed they feared little Rina would nuke them if they had nukes even though Spitz Rail was always threatening to nuke little Rina.

The monkey said the only way for Rue Rue to prevent nuclear war is to threaten to give Rina nuclear weapons technology which technically is not an act of war if the Monkey's home country giving the country that borders Rue Rue weapons of mass destruction is not an act of war.

By threatening to give the country of Rina nuclear arms if world war 3 is not cancelled, this could get other countries that do not fear their own destruction but want to avoid the destruction of Spiz Rail reason to call off their war to protect Spiz Rail even though they wanted to destroy the countries they govern.