The Monkey who Saved the World from Nuclear War

 Fiction

The Monkey who saved the World from Nuclear War

There once was a man who had a very bad mother.  His mother just had him around so she could get a welfare check.  She was supposed to get money to buy him food but gave him expired food that factories were giving away.and kept the money to spend on herself instead of buying him healthy food before the expiration date.

When he was old enough that the welfare check decreased but not yet an adult his mother sent him to his grandmother. because she could not get as much of a welfare check from him even though he dutifully obeyed her and babysat the other children she had with other fathers and provided valuable services to her before she kicked him out.

When he turned 18 he joined the navy to fight terrorists and protect American freedom.  He worked in military intelligence and was sent into the desert even though he was in the Navy which was supposed to do stuff on water.

Even though he saw people die in the Navy and nearly died himself it was less traumatic to him then how his mom abandoned him.  He got an economics degree and worked in a government office after completing his military service.

In order to prevent terrorist attacks on the building from a bomb inside a vehicle.  The parking lot was a very far distance from the building he worked in.  He would arrive early to the building in order to park as close as possible before the other parking spots fill, then get all his work done early before the supervisors arrive.

When the supervisors arrived it would look like he was doing nothing because he already got all the work done for the day and he nearly got fired.  But when they reviewed his work it was shown that he completed more work every single other employee individually did in his entire division.

He was not rewarded for this however and told that he needs to be working when the supervisors are watching.  He learned that other employees arrive early then go to sleep in the office until right before the supervisor's show up then start their work for the day so that they would do the work when the supervisor is watching.  He quit the work and started his own business doing financial planning assistance to clients on his own time.

During his life he dated many women.  Every single one was evil.  At first he thought it was his own fault and tried to fix himself.  But eventually he realized it was their fault.

He became so traumatized that he started to wear a monkey costume and play with dolls.  He started to do podcasts while wearing a monkey costume explaining how women manipulate men into manipulating other men to the harm of society.  Or how men betray other men to try to become popular with women resulting in women being able to control men through the violence of men who are willing to betray other men to try to be popular with women.

Although he was a total loser in the eyes of mainstream society and every one mocked him saying who hurt you, he saved the world.

What happened was Spiz Rail wanted to defeat his home country and start a Nuclear war.  Spiz Rail had convinced his home country to give weapons of mass destruction to a country on the border of Rue Rue.  They said technically this was not engaging in war against Rue Rue, but Rue Rue started attacking the country that borders it to defend itself and winning.  But the more Rue Rue won and the more his home country lost in the border wars the harder his home country pushed back and people in the President's Cabinet started suggesting nuclear war could be survivable.

Now the Monkey thought this made no sense, why would someone be so suicidal as to do this.  The Monkey then realised that more than one half of the president of his home country's entire cabinet all considered Spiz Rail to be their homeland first before the country they claimed to represent.  He realized Spiz Rail was trying to destroy his home country and actually wanted nuclear war with the plan of being the only country left in the world.  People from Spiz Rail have invaded all other countries in the world in government positions and always put Spiz Rail first before their own country's well being.

He realized they did not fear destroying their own country that they live in through mutually assured destruction in a nuclear war but actually intended to create such an event destroying all countries but Spiz Rail.  But he realised since they put the well being of Spiz Rail even before the country they live in, the only way to get them not to destroy the world with nukes was to get them to fear they might accidentally destroy their beloved Spiz Rail in their attempt to destroy all the other countries in the world.

He changed the focus of his podcasts and explained the only way to save the world from nuclear war.

Spitz Rail had lots and lots of weapons of mass destruction including nukes.  But was always trying to get people to destroy the little country of Rina claiming that they must be destroyed to prevent them from building weapons of mass destruction like nukes and must not be allowed to have nuclear power plants or nuclear medicine.  Spitz Rail claimed they feared little Rina would nuke them if they had nukes even though Spitz Rail was always threatening to nuke little Rina.

The monkey said the only way for Rue Rue to prevent nuclear war is to threaten to give Rina nuclear weapons technology which technically is not an act of war if the Monkey's home country giving the country that borders Rue Rue weapons of mass destruction is not an act of war.

By threatening to give the country of Rina nuclear arms if world war 3 is not cancelled, this could get other countries that do not fear their own destruction but want to avoid the destruction of Spiz Rail reason to call off their war to protect Spiz Rail even though they wanted to destroy the countries they govern.

Dan Sing Spiz Rail

 Fiction

Dan Sing Spiz Rail

On one fateful day in November 9 in the country with the most powerful military in the world the following happened.

A building was rigged for demolition but before that day of demolition all of the employees were told to sign non-disclosure agreements and told not to show up to work that day.  Those who did not sign the non disclosure agreements were fired officially for other reasons but unofficially because they would not sign the non disclosure agreements.  What were they told not to disclose?  Their work hours were added in as an extra detail in addition to the usual provisions in a non disclosure agreement.  They were told that disclosing their work hours to anyone who is outside the corporation they work for was a security risk because people could use knowledge of who is stationed to do work at what time and where to exploit security.  

Those who would not sign it were not hired or were fired as a security risk.  Now these agreements did not list the date of November 9 or any specific date but only an agreement not to list their work hours because if someone refused to sign the agreement they could mention that the date of November 9 is in a copy of the agreement they refused to sign.  However after the agreements were later signed all the employees were told the building is closed on November 9 for remodeling and that they are not permitted to enter the building that day or they will be fired and that they will be given paid vacation on November 9 and that according to the provisions in the non disclosure agreement they are not allowed to tell anyone outside the corporation they work for that they have the day off or that the building is being remodeled that day.

With no one there on November 9 except the demolition team the building was set up for demolition just like when you demolish an old building to tear it down so you can later replace it with a new building.  But that is not what people watching the TV would believe.

Although they could have used a drone plane with no passengers it was much cheaper for the news channels to use a computer generated image of a plane.  All the people present in the city of Zoo Gork near that building where this event happened did not actually see or hear a plane,  But those watching the television saw a computer generated image of a plane hit the building.

They then had actors who pretended to see that the building was hit by a plane.

In the original plans they debated if it was better to install smoke machines on the higher levels of the building or simply use computer generated images of smoke and whether or not the top part of the building should be set on fire before the explosive demolitions were set off.  They also debated whether a manequim should be launched out of the building by a set up created by an art team or if it is better to have computer generated images of humans jumping out of the building.

Whatever the planning committee finally decided on, people saw smoke coming out of the building and what looked like a person jumping out of the building on TV before the building came down.

Many people watching the television thought the building collapse was unusual since the news agency over the coming days intentionally created outlandish claims about technology never confirmed to exist that might very well be science fiction technology bringing down the buildings but the people who made these claims were actors or were other people who heard the actors sincerely believed them and repeated their claims.  But the real explanation was well within human ability and happens every time a building is demolished because it is condemned or in order to construct a new building only people did not realise it because of the fake actors outlandish theories or because they believed they saw a plane hit the building while watching the news.

Nobody actually died in the event because people were warned the building would collapse and were told to evacuate the area near the building by a combination of special actors posing as police and possibly also real police who were misinformed that the building was hit by a plane and who were trying to keep the public away from that region.  Once enough time had passed and enough people were cleared away, Lucky Harry Gold Stein said to pull the building down and then it collapsed.  Lucky Harry Gold Stein got a large amount of insurance money for the building even though it was destroyed in demolition which normally does not pay insurance because its cause of destruction was listed as something else in the news.

Now there were many actors on both secular and Church organizations' news channels that said they survived the building or evacuated the building or helped people evacuate the building in rescue missions or lost relatives in the building.  A special fund was used to pay actors who pretended to lose relatives in the building and to pay confused people who believed they lost relatives in the building but did not realise they were missing due to other causes.  Of course if they ever did find the person and admitted they found the relative they thought they lost in the building they could be told mistakes happen and be allowed to keep the money unless they said the event was a hoax in which case they would be told that if they thought the event was a hoax and nobody died then they were trying to defraud the government by claiming someone died there in that event when they knew did not.  When they were given this threat they changed the story and never brought up the idea of a hoax again or the person who collected the money then realised it was a hoax later when they found their relative alive simply disappeared.  Now many people who mistakenly believed they lost their relatives in the event in the building unknowingly became paid actors as long as they never found their lost relative, and this was very common because Zoo Gork is such a big city.  Of course some might have simply lied about losing their relative to get in on the money and thought they could trick the government into giving them money but actually they were tricked because the government knew they never lost their relatives but were paying them to testify that they did without their knowledge that they were intentionally being paid by the government as actors when they thought they were scamming the government.

People thought it must be real because of the firefighters when actually there were simply actors dressed up as firefighters.  Now some real firefighters did search the building for survivors because they did not know better and were tricked by the actors and although no one died in the collapse of the building these firefighters had their lungs damaged searching the collapsed ruins for people.  But many actors who played fire fighters pretended to have lung damage and got paid for acting in a compensation fund for lung damaged fire fighters that way.

Some of this did not even have to be paid by the government as people would raise charitable funds to help these people not knowing that most of them were actors.

Now the news organizations blamed Mud Slime people for the event and said that Mud Slime people hate Spiz Rail the greatest ally to their country and that they need to go to war against Mud Slime countries to protect their country and the nation of Spiz Rail from the Mud Slime people.

There was one problem with this however.  And people who know Spiz Rail was behind it debate if Spiz Rail intentionally let people know or if this was a rogue newscaster.

There was a man named Clark Camera Run who did a documentary on Danseurs from Spiz Rail

There was a woman who either really believed that the building was attacked by terrible people and not demolished or who was an actor pretending to believe as such

This woman saw immigrants from Spiz Rail who were Danseurs Dan Sing on a roof celebrating and calling the police.  The police captured these people and found evidence of their foreknowledge of the event.  But were forced to let them go because they were from Spiz Rail and were not Mud Slime people.

At least that is how Clark Camera Run's story went on Faux news which he allegedly later got fired from.  Faux news later pretended to have never ever played the story but unfortunately for them some people recorded it even though they removed it from their  news archive which was available to the public.

In Spiz Rail there was a secret meeting that led to the Danseurs Dan Sing and jubilation.  Here is a summary of the plan in the meeting.

We should blow up a building in the militarily most powerful nation of the world and then blame the Mud Slimes to start a war between the Mud Slime nations and the militarily most powerful nation in the world.  We can then use the news media we own and the puppet President we control to claim they should start a war looking for weapons of mass destruction in their country.  The people will not know any better even though Spiz Rail, the economically most powerful nation in the world, already has lots of weapons of mass destruction because they will simply not mention that in the news and we will use the news to call anyone who points out this hypocrisy to be prejudice against our race and our religion.  Meanwhile we can slander the Mud Slime race and religion accusing them of doing all the things that we are guilty of and people will believe it because they watch the news.  We already own all the major Churches and can use them in addition to the news to get people to worship people of our race and worship people of our religion and to slander anyone who says our people should not be worshipped as disobeying their god who we love to mock behind their backs.  We can also use their Churches to slander the Mud Slime people and anyone who denies the slander will be accused of wanting to exterminate our race and our religion and of disobeying the god preached in their Churches, meanwhile we will use their Churches to promote the extermination of the Mud Slime people and all other races and religions than our own and eventually when they have eliminated the Mud Slime people and all other races and religions than our own we will convince the Church goers to commit suicide by using their Pastors who are our agents and then we will be the only Race and Religion left on the earthly realm except some of them who are the most blindly loyal to use who we shall leave behind as slaves who think they are blessed by god for blindly obeying us.  We will use some prisoners to drink their blood and harvest their organs.

The wife who cracked Mo Sephenias code

 Fiction

Mo Sephenia's code and The Forbidden Marriage

The wife who cracked Mo Sephenias code

Samsonitus lived in the country of Icerailia which ironically was a desert instead of a land full of ice.

Generations ago a woman named Mo Sephenia gave a list of laws that everyone in Icerailia was supposed to obey which all the people who heard the laws at the time agreed to obey.  But later generations tended to only hear the general concepts of the law in a form that is an incomplete and imperfect copy through traveling lawyer priests and by word of mouth from neighbor to neighbor.  

It is not that the laws were not preserved perfectly in written form but most people could not read and write and written copies of the original legal agreement between Mo Sephenia and the people originally present before her were rare and hard to come by and the law was too long for most people to memorize completely and perfectly with the large amount of time they had to devote to agricultural labor just to get enough food to stay alive from one year to the next.  

To make matters worse some of the people of Iceralia were greedy hedonistic merchants who did not even care to hear the law from traveling lawyer priests or from neighbor to neighbor, because it would go against their hedonistic lifestyle and listening to it would take time away from their dishonest sales and crooked lending endeavors and would interfere with the profit they made out of illegally kidnapping and selling innocent victims who broke no laws worthy of being captured and sold into slavery.  It is not that all merchants are dishonest, but a higher percentage of Iceralia's merchants were dishonest than merchants of other countries.

Samsonitus lived next door to a man named Nabal.

Nabal had sisters and aunts and women first cousins but no uncles or brothers or male first cousins and Nabal's father and grandfather were dead.  Nabal's only wife was named Nancy.  Nabal and Nancy had only one son named Alexander and Nancy was pregnant but had not given birth to a daughter yet.

Samsonitus was unmarried and had a brother named Samuel who was living with him.  Samuel was married to only one woman who was named Sinderlina and had no children with her.

Now Nabal was a drunkard who wanted to party like a dishonest merchant instead of working hard for an honest living like the farmers of Iceralia.  

Nancy was begging Nabal to use their Ox to do farming work so that they could have food later instead of selling their Ox for more wine and continuing to get drunk and not do any farming work or other labour to put food on the table in the long run once the wine runs out.

Nabal the drunk said, "This is the last straw Nancy!  I divorce you!  And I tell you what I think of you and your ox.  I think your Ox would be happier if he had a little less whining from you and a little more wine to drink from me."

He proceeded to try to take an open wine bottle and stick it in the Oxes mouth to try to make it drink the wine.  Whatever he actually ended up doing Nabal made the Ox so mad that it gored him to death.

The Ox then proceeded to run mad and Gored innocent Samuel to death and almost killed Alexander and Nancy only for Samsonitus to snatch them out of harm's reach.

Somehow Samsonitus managed to calm the Ox down after this, preventing it from killing any more people or merchants.

Nancy quickly went into labor after this and gave birth to a daughter who she named Anna

Now the widow Sinderlina and the divorcee or widow Nancy had a discussion about what to do now that their husbands were dead or in Nancy's case more technically now that her ex husband was dead.  Since Sinderlina was so emotionally supportive of Nancy throughout all the many years of Nabal's drunkenness, Nancy did not want to depart far away from Sinderlina to marry another man and they both liked Samsonitus who was strong and supportive.

So they mutually agreed to ask Samsonitus if he would be willing to marry both of them together.  Samsonitus agreed.

Samsonitus was 18 years old, Sinderlina was 27 years old and Nancy was 36 years old when they got married

When Anna turned 18 years old, Samsonitus was 36 years old, Sinderlina was 45 years old and Nancy was 54 years old

On her 18th birthday Anna went to talk to her mother Nancy

Anna said, "Nancy there is something I want to ask your advice on but I am afraid if I ask your advice you will be angry.  But if I just do it without asking your advice you will be even more angry.  So I could just not do it at all but then I think I would be disappointed for the rest of my life, for having missed an opportunity to do something that is really important to me because I am afraid it might make you angry even if there is a chance it might not make you angry at all.  Can you promise not to hold it against me for asking permission to do something, if I promise not to do it if you do not want me to?"

Nancy said, "You seem to really be concerned about my feelings and not out to cause me harm since you are willing to deny doing whatever you want to do for my sake.  Whatever problem I might want to avoid can be avoided if I tell you not to do it, and whatever benefit you get can still be achieved without a problem of significant concern to me if I feel it is an idea so good I can approve of it.  No harm can be done by a bad idea that you choose not to act on and benefit can come from a good idea that you choose to act on.  If you keep silent you might not be able to know if the idea is good or bad.  But if you talk we can evaluate together if the idea is good or bad.  Plus you are my daughter and I love you and want what is best for you so tell me please."

Anna said, "I do not want to take him away from you by being a third wife, and I do not know if it is proper or incest on account of you being my mother, but I would like if you are ok with it and only if you are ok with it to marry your husband Samsonitus and be his third wife."

Anna said, "Not only have you not upset me, but my heart is overflowing with joy.  Even though I wanted you to experience the bliss of marriage, I always dreaded the idea that one day you would marry a man far away and I would never see you again.  If you marry my husband we will always be together as long as all three of us shall live.  If you want to marry my husband I would prefer that you marry him over any other man in the whole world so that I can be together with you.  And since Samsonitus is not your biological father but Nabal is it would not result in deformities.  And I am sure the whole reason it was forbidden for a father to marry his biological daughter and other incest regulations given by Mo Sephenia was to prevent deformities.  But he is not your biological father so as far as I am concerned it is not incest for you to marry him from a biological point of view.  I do not remember any law forbidding a man from marrying a woman and her daughter as long as neither of them are a biological relative of the man."

So Samsonitus married his third wife.

36 year old Samsonitus was now married to 18 year old Anna, 45 year old Sinderlina and 54 year old Nancy.  Some people might complain about how Samsonitus was too much older than Anna but Anna was of legal age and Samsonitus was no more older than Anna than Nancy was older than Samsonitus. Nancy pointed out to Anna that if she liked Samsonitus the age gap was perfectly fine just as it was ok for her to marry Samsonitus with an equal age gap.

One month later a lawyer priest came by the house and read some of the laws of  Mo Sepehenia.  He did this because his job was to go from house to house and community to community and read the laws of Mo Sepehenia to any people who wanted to hear them because not everyone could read and written material was difficult to make during that time period so even if someone could read they did not necessarily have a copy of the laws.  

The priest read a law that, "If a man marries a woman and her daughter all three of them are to be executed and if they are pregnant they are not to be spared until they give birth but still executed immediately."

They asked, "What if the man who marries the woman's daughter is not the biological father of her daughter?"

The priest said, "There is a law to execute a man who marries his daughter along with his daughter that he marries and they would not have violated that specific law in such a case, but the law against marrying a woman and her daughter is a completely different law that such a marital group would be executed for violating."

Then the priest said, "Why do you ask?  Do you have anyone you would like to report who is guilty of such an offense who we should put to trial and execute if found guilty."

They said, "We do not know of anyone who we would like to report.  We do believe it is important however to know the law with absolute precision to warn people to prevent such an occurrence by accident if they wanted to do so but did not know it was illegal.  And we wanted to clarify in case someone in our neighborhood wants to do so in the future or in case there might be any other reasons why it might be important to know."

The priest replied, "I wish everyone else I visited to teach were as enthusiastic about knowing the finer points of the law as you all are.  If you do not mind I would like to stay here a few more nights and I can read the whole law to you in entirety since you are worthy to hear it all, truly desiring to listen with more sincerity than anyone else I have ever shared the law with before."

They said, "We will make a place for you to stay overnight and cook you a meal."

They then prepared him a meal and a place to sleep.  After the Priest went to sleep they left the house never to return again fleeing to the far away country of Hindistania to the east, where they lived together as a family outside the jurisdiction of Icerailia happily ever after.

list of blogs

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/09/list-of-blogs.html

List of Fiction Stories

22

The Monkey who Saved the World from Nuclear War

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/09/the-monkey-who-saved-world-from-nuclear.html

21

Dan Sing Spiz Rail

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/09/dan-sing-spiz-rail.html

20

Mo Sephenia's code and The Forbidden Marriage

The wife who cracked Mo Sephenias code

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/09/the-wife-who-cracked-mo-sephenias-code.html

19

Brain Control Parasites versus Bugs and Humans Part 1

Part 1 Brain Control Parasites vs Bugs and Humans (worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com)

18

Man Living in a Grocery Store

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/09/man-living-in-grocery-store_3.html

17

Shortcut Sam

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/shortcut-sam-fiction-shortcut-sam-tried.html

16

Body Swap Weight Loss

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/swap-weight-loss-fiction-windy-marie_18.html

15

Fraudstein

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/fiction-there-was-guy-named-fraudstein_4.html

14

Recycling Gnomes

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/gnomes-fiction-bob-put-away-recycling.html

13

Smoke Box

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/smoke-box-fiction-steve-walked-to.html

12

Drowning Wall

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/wall-fiction-steve-was-going-to-college.html

11

Night Fountain Bird

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/08/fountain-bird-reveals-already-obvious_63.html

10

Fake Pyramids

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/pyramids-fiction-steve-was-watching.html

9

Spiz Rail E Terrorists

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/spiz-rail-e-terrorists-fiction-names.html

8

Secret Habbad Meeting

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/meeting-andrew-was-walking-home-and.html

7

Steve's Projected moon myth

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/projected-moon-myth-fiction-steve-once.html

6

Fourth of July Time Warp

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/fourth-of-july-time-warp-it-was-on.html

5

Population Numbers Prequel

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/this-is-prequel-to-stories-about-future.html

4

Preacher of Death

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/preacher-of-death-although-this-story.html

3

A Mirror Goya

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/a-white-man-named-amir-goya-was-in.html

2

The Next Coming of Jesus

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/the-next-coming-of-jesus-jesus-might.html

1

Math Death Squad 1

https://worldchristianfaith.blogspot.com/2023/07/officer-kunta-kinte-said-open-up-math.html

Man Living in a Grocery Store

 Fiction

Man Living in a Grocery Store

There was a large grocery store in Joe's neighborhood that opened no earlier than 6 AM and closed no later than 10 PM depending on the day of the week.  As it approached 10 PM they would end what used to be the standard checkout with a cashier, bagger and conveyor built meanwhile they would intentionally start to close down the self check out computers one at a time instead of all at once after the store closes.  Then the staff would complain about people taking too long to check out groceries when the people formed a long line.  But it was the staff and or managements fault since the customers would not have formed  a long line if the staff waited until the store officially closed to turn off the self checkout computers.

Now Joe would sometimes walk in the middle of the night at 2 or 3 AM long before the store opens or closes and through the glass window Joe would see a man in the store eating food all by himself while sitting on a chair by a lunch table.  Joe wondered if a very smart man who was poor, homeless or cheap and does not fear the law found a way to stay in the store at night and eat the store food.  Was the staff still working in the night to load groceries in the store and it was his lunch break?  If so, why was he sometimes the only person there? How horrible it would be if he forgot to pack his lunch and he was surrounded by groceries but could not eat any or be arrested or fired.  Of course he could just buy groceries with the self checkout except they were closing them all one by one before Joe left.

Shortcut Sam

Shortcut Sam

Fiction

Shortcut Sam tried out for the high school track team.  They had a track with multiple lanes and each lane had a different number.  The track was composed of straight lines and curved lines and wrapped around in a loop.  The route around the outside lane was bigger than the route around the inside lane.

Shortcut Sam started in the outside lane and ended up drifting into the most inside lane into the wrong place.  The coach said you are in the wrong lane and that would disqualify you in an official race but this is just tryouts.

Since you are so fast I think you should race but I need you to go in a straight line.  If you try a shorter distance track then the path is a straight line so you should be able to stay in your lane easier, please try racing from here to there.

So Sam raced on the path the coach told him.  The coach had all the other students race that same distance also.  

The coach said, "Sam, you had the best time, you made the team."  He then told him when the next competitive race against other school teams was.  He told Sam that although you have the best time right now you still have to show up to practices in order to continue to improve before the big race.

Sam said, "I do not need to go to practice.  I had the best time."

The coach said, "You made the best time for now for this school but if you do not continue to practice, the other students who do practice will eventually do better than you and also we do not know if your current time is better than the best current time of students at the other schools, so if you do not show up to practice you can not run in the big race."

Sam replied, "You are just discriminating against me because I am from the inner city."

The day of the big race came and Sam did not show up to a single day of practice but he arrived early for a pre race meeting.

The coach told him you did not show up to a single day of practice and now you want to race.  Sam replied, "I do not need to practice, I am the best and I will prove it right now."

The coach said, "Normally you should not race so soon before the big race because it will tire you but I will time you and if you can run across the same distance as last time faster than every single other student then you can run the race."

Sam said, "I will"

Sam ran and the coach timed him and he got exactly the same time.

The coach said, "Sam, your time is exactly the same as last time."

Sam said, "Last time I ran I was faster than all the other students therefore I am the fastest and you must let me race."

The coach said, "Since all the other students were practicing, the very worst of the other students now has a better time than what your best time was before you started practicing.  You do not have the very best time of all my students, you actually now have the very worst time because you never showed up to practice so you never improved."

Now this was not the only time Sam took a shortcut.  Taking Shortcuts was Shortcut Sam's way of life.

Sam lived in the inner city but bussed to a school in the suburbs.  He was not a good friend to Patient Pat but Patient Pat was a good friend to Shortcut Sam.  But Shortcut Sam always said Patient Pat was mean to him because he was warning him to do things the right way even if it takes longer and is harder work because in the long run you will have better results and not having to fix mistakes later will actually save you time in the long run.

For example Patient Pat tried to explain the importance of trying to learn to do math with a paper or pencil or in his head instead of using a calculator.  But Shortcut Sam called Patient Pat an evil man who was guilty of discriminating against him because he was from the inner city and because of his disability instead of thanking him for his helpful advice and useful warning.

When Shortcut Sam was told he had to do math homework by the math teachers.  He told the math teachers, "No I do not, you are just assigning me homework as a way of discriminating against me because I am from the inner city."

The teachers said, "We are not discriminating against you, all the other students are assigned homework also.  You may think not doing homework is fun but in the long run you will not be able to do math if you do not practice."

Shortcut Sam said, "I do not need to practice the calculator already does math for me."

The teacher said, "You need to practice because if you do not learn enough self control to even study such a simple thing as this, you may take other shortcuts in life that could cause disasters."

Sam said, "I have a disability and if you do not let me use a calculator you are discriminating against me because of my disability and I will sue you."

The teacher said, "You need to take a special test by a qualified specialist to prove you are disabled."

Sam said, "You are just trying to claim I need to take a test to prove I am disabled because you are discriminating against me because I am from the inner city and I will sue you if you make me take the test."

The teacher slammed a calculator down on his desk and said, "Fine, you do not need to take a test to prove you are disabled, but I warn you if you continue taking these short cuts then disaster awaits you."

Sam said, "Disastrous awesomeness like not having to study!"

Years later Sam finally graduated from high school but he got a certificate of completion instead of a high school diploma.

Next Sam enrolled for college classes and paid for it with money from FAFSA

He then said since I am paying them to give me credits I should not have to show up to classes and he did not show up to any classes or take any tests nor did he withdraw from or cancel or drop any classes.

When he tried to enroll the next semester he was denied.  But he said where there is a willingness there's a way and more importantly a shortcut that does not take much strength of will to accomplish.  So he just enrolled in more colleges hoping he could get in anyway even though the FAFSA money did not work right. 

Now Sam started applying for lots of colleges and even though he had a very low GPA compared with other students from his suburban school who could not get into IVY leagues despite their hard work Sam was accepted into multiple IVY league Universities. How did he get into IVY league universities?  His parents never went to college, and he was from the inner city and registered as disabled even though he never proved he had a disability but merely said he did, and these factors could make up for his low grades.  Sam also had another secret, he was lazy, a truly lazy man.  Because Sam was so lazy that made him more similar to your typical person then the rare and exceptional people who tried hard.  This similarity to the common person made him a very persuasive talker who was very charming to your typical lazy person like college admission staff even though hard working people found him not to be charming but obnoxious.

Now the IVY league universities he was accepted into had so much donor money that unlike regular public schools, all students accepted whose parents made less than a certain amount of money get in for free as long as they fill out a FAFSA form.  Now some people make little money because of unfortunate life circumstances beyond their control or because they sacrificed their income and or wealth for a greater good but not Sam's parents. Sam's parents had little money because they, like Sam, were lazy in fact they taught Sam to be a lazy person.

Now there was one catch Sam only had to fill out a FAFSA.  But because his grades were so low he was on academic probation and because he wanted to hide his low grades from when he skipped a whole semester and because he owed debt he did not pay back for not showing up to classes, he could not get FAFSA to get through correctly to get the IVY league universities to consider him qualified for free tuition.

Now as for the debt on the FAFSA due to some special circumstance it was forgiven because things tended to go his way even though he did nothing to earn or merit such good fortune.  But it came with a weird catch that he was not allowed to use FAFSA again for 3 years after it was forgiven.

He told Patient Pat, "This is so unfair I should be allowed to go to college now, for free and not have to pay anything for it.  I do not want to be older than such and such a age when I get my bachelors degree"

Patient Pat said, "You can go to college now you already earn enough money to afford technical college without taking out any loans or getting any grants, scholarships or fellowships and still have money left over for food and rent.  You can also take CLEP classes if you put in the effort to study at an even cheaper price than that.  A credit toward graduation is a credit toward graduation regardless of the source.  With that you can get an associate degree and pay off any college debt you have with the better job you can get with an associate degree.  An associate degree is better than no degree even if it is only halfway toward a bachelor's degree and if you have an associate degree with good grades then you are even better qualified to get into IVY league schools than when you first applied and were already accepted with no previous college degree.  And you might not even have to worry about paying off debt to use the FAFSA to get into the IVY league for free. Did you not just say it was forgiven and all you had to do was wait 3 years then you can use the FAFSA and get into the iVY league for free?  Just be patient and things will work out better then if you take some rash shortcut"

But Shortcut Sam said, "No, I need you to help me write essays for scholarships.  Since I can not get FAFSA money I need scholarships that do not require FAFSA to go to college."

Patient Pat said, "Why should I help you write essays for scholarships for a school that you will never graduate from because you will not study or practice math  in order to pass the math classes necessary for the very specific type of degree you wanted that requires lots of math, even though I told you about other options that require less math, but even those options require more math then you are willing to learn.  You must prove that to me you will not quit before you start like when you ran the race or used a calculator for math that even fourth graders could do on paper or in their head while you were still in high school, not because you were unable to but because you never tried.  You must prove it by studying math with me until you are at least up to fourth grade level without a calculator otherwise you will not be able to pass college remedial math.  I expect you to study 1 hour with me every day, frankly that is not enough time, because there would be 720 hours if you studied an hour a day for 180 days a year for the four years from first, second, third and fourth grade that a regular child would study just by showing up to class every day and doing the work without a calculator not to count any homework outside of class and you want to go to college in less than 120 days from now, which would only give about one sixth that many hours if I merely ask an hour a day from you instead of the full 6 hours to catch up for the time you slacked off with your calculator shortcuts instead of doing real math for all those years of math class."

Shortcut Sam said, "You are discriminating against me because of my disability and because I am from the inner city."

Patient Pat said, "If you were not from the inner city where you were raised by such lazy parents I would not even be willing to talk to such a lazy person as you.  You should be grateful that I offered to teach you math for free instead of charging you many times more than minimum wage which I could and most people who have my level of education if they were willing to even spend the time to teach you at all instead of getting a real job.  As for your disability there are some people who really are disabled but I know you and you are just lazy, you never tried to prove you are disabled, if I saw you trying all those hours and still could not succeed then maybe I would believe you but the only disability you have shown me until you have spent hours trying and failing  is the disability of laziness and pure and simple not trying "

Shortcut Sam he would study and put in less than 20 minutes a week on average, but lied and tried to make it look like he was serious and deceived Patient Pat.

So Patient Pat helped with the scholarship essays because Shortcut Sam was pretending to start to put in the effort.

When Patient Pat found out what Shortcut Sam did he said he would help him with no more essays and warned him that if he actually helped him get into college and graduate but he still did not learn his lesson to work hard instead of taking rash shortcuts disaster would await him.

Shortcut Sam got into college and Patient Pat never talked to him again.

When Shortcut Sam got into his remedial math classes the teachers said, "To truly understand this math you need to practice it on paper or in your head instead of using a calculator otherwise you will not be able to understand these concepts to apply them to more advanced math classes you need to actually use for your major."

But Shortcut Sam said, "If you do not let me use a calculator I will sue you, for discriminating against me because of my disability and because I am from the inner city."

More over Shortcut Sam used his persuasive ability on the administrators who only were greedy and self censored for college tuition money and the short term praise and reward from their fellows about bragging about helping the disabled and disadvantaged people from the inner city even though in the long run such noble deeds as they wanted praise for doing actually were seeds along the path of destruction Patient Pat and Shortcut Sam's gym coach and math teachers had warned about.  Shortcut Sam persuaded the Administrators that not only should he be allowed to use a calculator for remedial math but he should get special privileges to skip entire math courses that other more hard working people who took the same major as him were normally required to take because it was impossible to do advanced math with his disability and to deny him a degree would be failure to accommodate and discrimination.

Now with his degree disaster awaited but unfortunately not for Shortcut Sam but merely for everyone else around him.

Shortcut Sam started getting many jobs in fields where he was the boss of people who knew how to do math even though he did not know how to do basic math himself.  Now these jobs could be done correctly with very little math knowledge.  But these jobs could not be done correctly by someone so lazy as to not be able to bother to learn even a very little bit of math knowledge and who had the kind of personality to always take shortcuts to get around the effort of learning because they would rather stay ignorant.  Shortcut Sam's real problem was not his lack of math knowledge but his bad personality and attitude that led to him never acquiring math knowledge in the first place.  This reckless personality led him to taking dangerous shortcuts in matters other than math.

All Sam had to do for each of these jobs was get people to sign paperwork certifying that they did the different parts of the job correctly such as inspection, or calculations, or the actual physical tasks required for each stage of a job.

All he had to do sometimes was essentially carry a clipboard with forms where people checked off that they did different parts of jobs.  Same did not have to write the forms or choose the forms they were all given to him.  All he had to do was walk up to the person and ask them to sign the form.  Now although sometimes these forms seem rather silly, if someone does not actually do the task on the form and people think they did people could die because they were put there to ensure certain minimum safety requirements were met.

But Sam instead of actually bringing the forms to people checked off the boxes himself, putting a fake signature of someone else's name and then turned the forms in and took off work early.

Sam made lots of money this way and as far as he was concerned no disasters happened to him and Patient Pat was wrong.  Sam went through one high paying administration, business, human resources or management job after another and even got selected and elected for different government jobs and political offices from time to time.  Sam was admired by the ignorant masses, he was famous and successful.  He lived to a ripe old age dying about 10 years later than average only to die of a heart attack which could have been prevented or at least delayed until 20 years later if he was not too lazy to exercise and eat healthy.

Even though Sam could not see that he walked the path of disaster, Patient Pat did.  Patient Pat pointed out Sam's string of failures: the bridge collapses, the skyscraper collapses and the unusually high rate of medical malpractice and patient deaths at different construction projects and hospitals that Sam administered.  There was also the tainted drinking water scandal and the mismanaged and failing infrastructure and public transportation problems when Sam was mayor.

Sam had murdered more than 1 million people throughout a lifetime of negligence but he was hailed a hero and celebrated in public school history books as an outstanding person who achieved great things despite being discriminated against for his disability and inner city upbringing.

Body Swap Weight Loss

 Body Swap Weight Loss

Fiction

Windy Marie had the ability to switch bodies with people.  Whether it was Windy's magic witchcraft or Marie's mad science that she used to switch bodies does not matter.

Windy really liked Matthew but Matthew was dating his fiancee Sabrina.

Windy was morbidly obese.  Her diet consisted of whole milk and dairy products without any fat reduction such as cream, butter, cheese, cream cheese and ice cream as well as margarine, fried foods, fried french toast, french fries, breaded and fried vegetables and  breaded and fried,meat, and fatty meat products not lean meat product and deserts such as cake, cookies, and sugary candy.  She avoided any vegetable that was not covered in cheese, margarine or butter or fried in fatty oil.  She did eat fruit sometimes like deep fried bananas or cherries on top of ice cream.  When eating eggs she would separate the fatty yolk that she liked from the egg whites and throw away the egg whites.  

Windy would order pizza with extra meat ( and not the lean kind of meat ) and extra cheese.  She would cut out the crust and then unwrap individual slices of processed cheese containing products with artificial ingredients from their plastic packets which she would wrap around the crust like a blanket and put in the microwave to melt the extra cheese around the crust.  After taking out the crust with melted cheese from the microwave she would put it on a plate with the rest of her pizza or sometimes put it on top of the pizza already inside the box using the box instead of a plate.  Next, she would put butter and margarine in a microwave safe bowl and stick it in the microwave to melt it then pour the melted butter and margarine all over the pizza and pizza crust.  

 

Matthew worked at the pizza delivery company and she would order pizza a lot to force Matthew to visit her.  

She considered it exercise to push the button in her automated wheelchair to get over to the door and pick up pizza from Matthew.

With her automated wheelchair she had scrapped up the wood in her place of residence.  She broke a table trying to push on it to get up to the microwave to melt her butter and margarine once.  So she now had the microwave and fridge in just the right place on a much stronger table positioned differently to make it easy to melt butter and margarine without breaking a table again.

Windy's diet and exercise habits were very different from Sabrina.

Sabrina ran an exercise program for pregnant women and was receiving education to become a midwife.  Sabrina was also a pilates and core exercise instructor, personal trainer and weight loss coach.  Sabrina would spend three hours a day stretching while studying for her midwife program.  

Sabrina looked up women's Olympic time for swimming, biking and running various distances.  Sabrina would always exercise at the highest speed she could consistently maintain for each distance she biked, ran or swim and came close to women's olympics swimming and running distances but could not quite do well enough to qualify.  Sabrina would swim, bike or run 4 to 7 days a week at various distances ranging from sprinting to long distance depending on how much time she had that day.  Sometimes she would use a treadmill or stationary bike.while watching educational material and sometimes she would run or bike outdoors.

Sabrina would also lift weights while watching educational materials in her home gym and got first place in a women's power lifting contest that was local to her region.

Sabrina took monkey style kung fu and would spend a half an hour each day outdoors practicing various moves similar to gymnastics using the soft grassy ground to do handstand walking, front and back handsprings, flips, cartwheels and so on.

Sabrina ate a high carbohydrate high protein vegetarian diet eating fat free skim milk and fat free dairy products and never consumed butter margarine, or foods with added hydrogenated or trans fat.  Sabrina avoided food with animal fat except the occasional eggs because the only dairy products she consumed were fat free.  Windy took vitamin and mineral or dietary element supplements to avoid any gaps in nutrition from her diet.  She used flaxseeds, flaxseed oil, canola oil and chia seeds to ensure she had enough Omega 3 fatty acids but never used fish oil supplements because they violated her vegetarian value system.

Matthew liked Sabrina because of her self improvement, fitness and nutrition oriented lifestyle.  Matthew wanted to have a family with Sabrina so he could raise super smart, morally upright children who only ate healthy food choices, and who achieved extreme fitness goals like Sabrina.

Many people liked Sabrina because they described her as smoking hot but that is never why Matthew liked Sabrina.  Matthew liked Sabrina because he thought she had good values that would result in her being a good mother who would raise children with good values.

Although Windy could walk she chose not to because she would rather use the wheelchair.  Windy Marie used some sort of magic and or technology to see and listen to Matthew and Sabrina without them knowing.

Windy found out where they would go on a date by an outdoor cafe that is within sight distance of a bank security camera.

Windy walked up within line of sight of Matthew and Windy and the bank security camera.  

Windy pulled out an illegal drug needle from her purse and injected herself with it and then threw it on the ground instead of in a nearby safe needle disposal bin.

Windy made sure she was near a chair or table leg and that Matthew was looking at her when she did this.  Windy then pulled out a shotgun and pointed the gun at Sabrina and yelled, "I want to buy drugs, give me your money so I can buy drugs or I will shoot you."

Windy then yelled, "now," while shooting the shotgun vertically in the air and walked forward with an angry look on her face, pretending to accidentally trip over the chair or table leg.

Windy then pretended to accidentally drop the shotgun in such a manner that it travelled or launched a far distance away from her as she fell.

Sabrina immediately leaped to where the shotgun was and was about to grab it when Windy Marie shot a body switching ray at her, switching bodies with her.

Windy in Sabrina's body then grabbed the shotgun and pointed it at Sabrina in Windy's body and yelled, "Do not move or I will shoot!"

Matthew then called the police.

When they went to court Windy in Sabrina's body testified how she saw her shoot up illegal drugs and point a shotgun at her and demand she give her money.

Sabrina in Windy's body testified that Windy switched bodies with her with a body switching ray and she had been framed.

Windy was declared insane and court ordered to go to a special facility to get psychiatric treatment for her delusions in addition to drug addiction treatment

Matthew broke up with Sabrina after she started behaving like Windy.  Matthew said, "I am not breaking up with you because you gained weight but because you started picking up a lot of really bad habits.  Your bad habits will cause you to die early so you can not be there for your children if you have any.  If you serve your children the type of food you eat they will have serious health problems.  I want any children I become a parent to, to learn monkey style kung fu from you, as well as how to become super athletes, but now you do not even exercise.  I wanted to raise children to be smart but now you never study anymore and will not pass on the value of learning new things to them nor will you have any knowledge to teach them because you quit learning yourself.  I wanted you to teach my future children moral values, but the only values you seem to have lately are laziness and gluttony which I do not want to teach my children.  There is no point in marrying you if you would not be a good mother."

After Matthew broke up with Windy in Sabrina's body he started visiting Sabrina in Windy's body who he noticed lost a lot of body fat and put on a lot of muscle and was exercising regularly and eating healthier than Windy would.  Sabrina in Windy's body told Matthew she stopped eating a vegetarian diet because she could not control what she eats at the facility completely and can not just order foods and supplements to get enough nutrition with a vegetarian diet in the facility, but if she ever gets out she plans to return to a vegetarian diet again.

Matthew told Sabrina in Windy's body about what happened to Windy in Sabrina's body and how she started acting like Windy and that he believed she was telling the truth.  They made a plan that Sabrina in Windy's body would tell them that she realizes she was wrong and was jealous of Sabrina all along and she made up a story because she wanted to blame Sabrina for her drug and eating disorder and to have a way to get out of responsibility for her actions and that she must have hallucinated or had delusions that resulted in her blaming Sabrina well under the influence of drugs and that she was just using drugs as a way to get out of the pain of the consequences of her laziness and eating disorder.

After many months and many visits from Matthew, Sabrina in Windy's body was finally released and then married Matthew.

When Windy in Sabrina's body found out, she said to herself that, "Matthew broke up with me and married her because she had a smoking hot body even though she had a horrible personality and he did not like me because I was obese even though I had a great personality.  I am so done with that scumbag Matthew!"

Windy in Sabrina's body then found another skinny woman who was dating another man she liked and repeated the process and switched body's with her.